Ugh, today I was lazy and slept in at his house, then I came home and worked on all my email, and discussions I am in volved in. All of the earnings from working yesterday have already been sent out to pay bills.

I am about to retire to work on some of the costumes I have in progress for the show. It is friggin expensive. One half assed package of 3 yards of beaded fringe cost $10 plus tax, and it has taken more than that to do this one bra. The bra alone didn’t cost but $10 with the panties. I can’t find a place that sells in bulk. I mean i am using this for a ton of different stuff, and if all the girls in the burlesque show bought in bulk and shared with each other we would have tons of variety in decorating items for less. I have proposed doing a craft box, and a craft night where we all have a little get together discuss I deas for the show and work on decorating costumes and working on props together.

We went and picked up 2 huge pink hotel curtains at a store that sells stuff that was used in hotels for cheap and donated them to the show. Now we can replace the screens that went with one of the girls that recently left the show. I also pointed out that the same curtains would fit the boudoir theme of the set that occupies the stage most of the show if used to replace the back drop that we had when that performer left the group. These curtains cost a lot less than the cost of the fabric alone, with each one costing $20 for 9 feet wide and 7 feet long.

Well, we only pull in between nothing and $20 per girl after tipping the prop guys so this performing stuff is only for fun and for the chance to be seen regularly. I was raised in the theater, so all I ever was tought day in and day out was being on stage. It didn’t matter whether I danced, sang or acted, as long as I was constantly rehearsing and performing. I love it.

We don’t get our investments in props re-embersed to us…we donate such things because if the show looks bad we look bad. Some of us are in the company because we want to be fetish performers at major fetish events, and no better way than performing as often as possible, and others actually aspire to be burlesque artists. I want to do the fetish performances, but when I am doing burlesque I want to do my very best at it. I have started looking into actually studying the masters of the art and the costumes. I don’t like to do anything half assed.

Ah, this day has been one long day of rants, aside from my 3 hours of various sessions.

It was a good day otherwise. I just hate that we all can’t live our life happily without some person dictating what everyone can do with their bodies. I can’t stand living in a country where it is plainly obvious that the current president did something fishy to win the election, after the other guy had already been declared victor.

I wish all of us were free to feel okay for who we are and our quarky fetishes, and our unusual simple pleasures. Why should we have to be ashamed of enjoying something consensually, or even solo.

Who is harmed by a person who likes to transgender..yet people still feel that it is somehow something to be hidden, or something wrong to not be done all together.

Who is to say another person shouldn’t fall in love and be given the same rights as other people just because they fell in love with a person of the same sex? They are lucky to feel that way at all, so why care what sex they are!

Why is it that the country gets thrown out of wack by a single glimpse of a woman’s breast, as if most children have an attention span to watch the super bowl, and hadn’t seen them already? Other children are raised on nude beaches, and watching partial nudity on commercials.

Why is it our constitution and bill of rights guarantee us Freedom of religion, but I haven’t seen one issue on the news lately where God wasn’t brought into the debate. Every Presidential Address starts sounding like the 700 Club.

Why is it we seek to oppress people with our laws, when originally this country was formed by people who longed to free themselves from oppression?

Why do we have sensorship on simple words, which only further makes children want to say them? Have you heard school kids speak to each other? They already know worse language than some of the adults.

What happened to trying to just do you best, be your best, and have pride in yourself with out forcing others to live by your system of beliefs…that doesn’t follow the teaching in the bible.

No one told them that if gay marriage were legal they would be required to marry the same sex, it is a choice.

No one told them that if they heard offensive language that they couldn’t change the chanel.

No one told them that when abortion became legal that they had to have one too…that is a choice.

How come the people that want to leave the rest of the country with a choice, even when it is lesbians fighting for abortions and people that never anticipate needing a gay marriage fighting for gay people’s right to marry, are made out to be the bad guys. The religious right would have you believe that we are destroying the American way of life, when in fact this country was raised on a revolution from oppression. This country’s foundation was being fed up and fighting to free us from our British roots. Now look at us. The British have breast shown on television all the time.

Look at those lovely socialist countries where everybody has a chance at college, not a country where a decent education in some cities, especially New Orleans is only for the rich.

Some of the biggest criminals are the ones making laws they don’t even live by. Some of the worst violence is commited by those that are supposed to keep us safe. This country is in denial about it’s true state of affairs.

I just am so tired of all of it. I wish I could just pick up and leave, but it is hard enough in this city to live here, much less leave here. Much less the whole riga-morole of leaving the country.

I am shocked that Bush hasn’t had an assasination attempt. I think 9/11 saved his career. People see him as being strong after that and gave him far too much credit. It wasn’t strength, it was part of his job description!!!

Lately, I find myself more and more disgusted with this country.
“empty” called me about the half time event with Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake. I told him that he needed to get a life for even calling me about such rubbish. If this was Europe we would see more than that on everyday commercials, and if it were Japan we would see a hell of a lot more…so much for the land of the Free.

As you know, we suckle our mothers breast as babies, yet up until we turn 18 we aren’t legal to view a magazine in the media or in a strip club.

I have been very political lately. I am extremely unnerved by all the gay marriage crap, because it is simply a matter of church and state.

I was raised being told that laws are made to protect people. All I see is laws made to line pockets by arresting people for victimless crimes.

Like my views on this country’s policy on “sex workers”. How are they protecting anyone? They should legalize it so that there would be health registration, and so that if a sex worker is raped or assaulted by a client they can report it.

I dearly hope that in the next year Bush and his lackeys are all out of office. They want to talk about this country being founded on Christian beliefs, but most of our founding forefathers were UNITARIANS!!! Yes, the type of Christians that have a lot of gay people in their fellowship. Unitarian clergy are the same ones that married my Buddhist mother to my Jewish stepfather.