Amidst a scene feeling betrayed by suburban governemnts, I felt I wanted to go to the NOBLE play party, but I don’t really feel up for dealing with play parties lately.

“empty” and I had played a bit and it had been really mentally and emotionally intense. Laterly (since the end of zoloft) I have been far more into the deep long journey into the sub’s head. I make them trust to the point that I swing them and they follow, and if I let go they fall. It can be a dangerous level of trust for some who have issues.

“empty” got frightened when he snapped to and realized he had been out, lost all space and time. I already had a migrane and knew I wouldn’t be long for a play party, and the intense intimacy is often jeopardised for the sake of play parties. There can be such a depth reached with out the distraction of people moving around your scene.

Jay Hova and Buddha arrived this morningFinaly. We had breakfast, but I spent the day working on getting stuff for the show tomorrow night.

I am tired, still migrained, and ready for bed.

I bought a couple of new scene books the otherday, and am stll the ebay champion. I have so many new cool toys on the way. I can’t wait.