It’s amazing with how open and laid back I am that I am all tension.

For almost a week I have had a certain someone trying to work out these knots to the point that there are now small cuts over them from being worked with short nails, and the knots are still there.

I was having numerous nightmares last night. I woke several times with anxiety attacks. But the funny thing is that I have been pretty damn happy otherwise. Infact, Jacque said she hasn’t seen me this happy in a while. Yesterday I was playful and really energetic on about 3 hours of sleep.

I have been staying in a lot lately. I just went out Thursday, Sunday, and then to movie night last night. Tonight is another night in.

I am debating on whether I should skip my first Thursday since 735 started taking over the 1984 night from Shim Sham, since I will leave on Friday to Houston for the ball…
By the way, Sarah, could you email me Adam’s phone number, he wants to get to see me while I’m there and hang out a bit, so he is collecting me when I arrive in town. It’s such a short trip and that is the easiest way to ensure I get to see him while there.

Damn, I still have a ton of my books and toys in storage at the monkey boy’s house. I have been meaning to pick them up for 4 years. And I need to call his parents because they have been wanting to see me. I didn’t have time to look them up last trip. God, they are great. It would also be nice to drop by the mining company on friday before going to Lara’s. I wish I wasn’t too busy for the Number’s Friday night usual. The girls performing the ball are all meeting at Lara’s for a slumber party to go over the show one last time, and then play before celebrating at the Ball.

I love being a pervert.

Awe, my Claudia just left. She got all the things done that she needed to do. Tonight she got her music worked on, today was the dentist and DMV, and Saturday night we sought out to say hello to old friends at their places of employment, and hung out with Mistress Natasha and her lover at their pool. And the night she came in, it was one of her male admirers, myself and she. We watched movies and cuddled, and she got to pay me back for the times my old lover and I would wake her with loud noise and the bed shaking. I live a very open life. I don’t think that sex is dirty or shameful, and my close friends and I are so close that we often talk to each other while we use the restroom, make out after a few drinks, and aren’t modest about our sex lives. We are close enough that neither is offended if things get frisky in the other’s presence.

This house is a shot gun anyway…so, if someone has to go to the kitchen or bathroom they will have to walk through where you are anyway.

I love Claudia..she is like family to me. We have never had a fight, we have always been there for each other and my home is hers when ever she needs a place to get away, even when she lives across the country. She still has her key, and sometimes when I miss her I hope that she will just show up here in new orleans and let herself in and surprise me.

Travel exhausted her and she slept most of the time she was here other than doing her errands and a couple of hours on the town.

I introduced her to “napoleon” for the firt time last night, and we all hung out together all night…I was surprised that with the role the both play in my life, and how close I am to the two of them, that they had never met before. While I had sessions today, he was a great help to her. he is a wonderful guy, despite what ever rough spots we encountered years ago…everything is really great the way it is now, no fights, just fun, and friendship, and heart felt closeness.

I am madly obsessing over new toys. I want to add more to the dungeon, though most of the stuff I am attempting to get is medical or small items for dominating women. Sadly there aren’t enough women for a more dedicated top/bottom relationship. I have many to play with but none are slave material for me.

I do have a vetical cage being buil, but there is a certain part they are trying to work out. It will go in the front room with the spanking horse and bondage futon that are rather discrete.

I also try to have a collection of paddles, floggers and restraints for each room. I try to have atleast 10-15 floggers and 5-15 paddles, and restraint sets in each room. I have 3 rooms that already have more than that in 2 and about that in the next. So that leasves 2 more rooms that I want them in to complete the basics for those rooms…but the sixth room of the house is going to be redone for strictly medical, water sports and toilet play. I just have to move out the washer, and move the medical table in and re arrang a few things.

I just got a new medical dress today, It is really sexy. This one Jacque is not allowed to borrow. She already wears all my corsets and fetish clothes since she doesn’t have any…but I want new clothes…I want special things.

I spent much of the day either in session, discussing dungeon rentals for shooting some pics for a media project someone called me on, planning devious parties for each month (I am going to start opening up my dungeon for parties again). I have been dreaming of fun and humiliating things to do at the parties.

I just had an idea…maybe during rodeo season I can call together other Mistresses and subs in the area and have a BDSM 4H (lol). We can show off our best pigs and horses.

I want to research the fertility festival in Japan where women carry large phalluses to the temple, and I want to have my own version where all of my Fem Domme guest take out their largest or favorite dildos and have fun at all the subbies’ expense.

There are so many sexual rituals and festivals through out various eastern religeion.

I want to have party every solstice and equinox where all the subbies practice living goddess worship. All of the dommes can dress as different goddesses of any origin they choose, and the subs will make offerings, sacrifices and devotion to them.

Of course, Thanksgiving slaves can serve as servants and furniture for our Thanksgiving dinner. They can prepare our food and entertain us and even serve as center pieces. We can even take any slave that’s cooking was bad and throw him in the back yard and splosh him, and those that can roman show can do that. Those that serve well can be rewarded by being played with after desert by one or several Mistresses. And I would imagine that Thanksgiving just wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without a turkey, so someone would have to be dressed as the turkey with a feather duster or some type of feather arrangement coming from his ass. Later he would have to be stuffed, so a condom can be put in his ass and filled with stuffing and then after all the mistresses have eaten he will be allowed to take the stuffing out of the condom and eat it himself.

It seems every month has some type of holiday to pervert, and if you can’t think of one, you can always borrow one from another culture and put your own twist on it. As long as each party celebrates Mistresses, and allow us to amuse ourselves by the humiliation and devoted efforts of our attending submissives.

I should call Nan at Club FEM and invite her to conspire against slaves and attend such events. I haven’t seen her or heard from her in a while. When my last cell phone bit the bullet I lost over 100 numbers, so I can’t replace.

If slaves come from out of town to attend a party I can always keep them in the cages below the bed. I have considered building a human dog house and putting it in the back yard. I can even make a little pair of dalmation thong under wear, and a little dalmation hood, and paws that will prefent him from using his thumbs (puppies don’t have thumbs). They would probably need protection from the knees down so the could run on their knees and fetch what Mistresses throw. This would be ideal for a pic-nic party come next summer.

I am sure we would need toilet slaves for Mistresses that consent to allowing toilet slaves the privledge of having their precious showers.

I can’t wait to start having these monthly or twice a month parties again. Halloween seems to always put me in the mood.

All the sudden my dirty little boys all are craving my precious poo. I can only make so much. Especially since I am living of salad before this performance. But I can enema and roman shower, and golden shower.

To all the mistresses that want to do a flatulation scene and have trouble producing gas…try using a piston syringe to load air in, it smells and sounds the same as a natural fart.

It is so fun to humiliate little subby sluts. I am going to have a blast today.

I had this great toilet scene last week with a New Yorker boy. Boy, I had his head restrained under my toilet seat. what missed his mouth I took a glove and forced and smeared it across his dirty little face. He was so happy. I fed him roman gold and brown while he was bound and helpless (consensually of course). And to let him have a special treat I put him in the tub and stood over him and vomited over his cock as he jerked off, and then humiliated him with mofe flatulation.

Why does dirty naught and otherwise gross stuff always loss their repulsiveness when it is done in the context of humiliating dirty little subbies?

The question is whether the first session today will get the privledge of it coming straight from the sorce, or whther i will have him lap it all up from a crome doggy dish. You know dogs…they tend to have this problem of trying to sniff your crotch…so you just have to slap the hell out of them. And since dogs live by the code of territorial pissing and they belong to me, I guess I need to make claim of my property, right?

I am so in the mood to play. I feel so inspired today. I just want to see those little pigs so happy rooting in my shit.

I have decided to reinstate my regular dungeon parties in October.

I was wanting input and ideas for holloween slave games.

So far I have decided on having slaves compete for something involving candy corn that I won’t disclose. Of course what is a BDSM dungeon party with out Mummies? And I have two other ideas involving pumpkins and jack-o-lanterns.

Last year I just had a pumpking carving party amongst friends…I figured it would be funny to get my friends drunk and set them lose with sharp objects…lol. We had some interesting pumpkins. Some were naked fetish mud flap girsl, ones that were bats, traditional jack-o-lanterns, one that said “bite me”. I made jello shots and red velvet cake so it looked like blood.

I love Halloween. I wait all years for the stores to break out the fun decorations and cheesy stuff.

I did an amazing over haul on the whole house. Jacque scrubber the kitchen and bathroom, but I tore the house apart, reorganized and re-arranged furniture. I like this arrangement. Now there is more space to exercise, and yoga.

After 24 hours of staying in, since she arrove, Claudia and I went out for a couple of hours to see if we could bump into people she knows. The Saint, Lounge Lizards, poked our heads in at the Dervish, and then to see Deana before a couple of friends called asking us to stay there a bit longer so we could go hang out at their town home and swim in the pool.

Claudia was tired, I wanted to make sure that she was in the right bed, not just their house to crash, but where her stuff was, where she would be able to come and go as she pleased since she still has the key I gave her when she lived her. And also, she seemed to be getting attention that she might be uncomfortable with if she fell asleep.

She is off to the dentist now. I have to do a once over, sweep and straighten. Between 3 cats and a Jacque, somethings have managed to be out of place already. I am determined that it will stay like this, orderly, sterile, and presentable.

I am watching Preaching to the Perverted again, and then will be yoga and exercise time. And I have a session in a while.

Ugh, I want to eat feely yummy bad for me food. But as of this morning I decided I can’t do that if I am going on stage this coming Saturday. I may just call for a salad to be delivered. It’s coffe enema time. Pop in the yoga DVD, and get out my exercise exuipment that I have been neglecting.

Claudia is still sleeping. “B” is on his way over for the day together. Jacque is a sleep. I am the only person resembling life at this point.

Man, I am pooped. I have yet to sleep. Claudia is here, I have been working while she slept. She must be pooped from the flight.

I have a long day tomorrow, and so does she. She will be in the music studio tomorrow working on a few songs.

I need to get a few hours sleep or I will keel over before we make it out to see our friends tomorrow night.

I have 5 days to drop a few pounds for the Fetish Ball. It’s salad city for me. I just realized Betka Shpitz’s Circus Fetish ball in Portland is the same day. I had no input ion the theme for the one in Houston, and I have no idea which came first…so don’t look at me. I wish I could be at both of them.

Jacque is due home in a bit, she has a session soon. I and I have one of my fave subs coming soon after. I am going to be a zombie.

I want Buffy in my muffy

Who is your sex slave? by JosephDarknight
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# of times you masturbate (yearly)	1
Your sex slave	Sarah Michelle Gellar
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