I fear for the social situation and the emotional lives of my friends in Houston.
A sick and sad event has occured. A beautiful boy was wasted, innocence lost, things that can never be undone or regained. Nightmares will haunt many who don’t deserve them just due to witnessing such horror. A city that wasn’t supportive of that scene in the first place will now, most likely, turn even more cold and hateful.
If this last weekend in Houston didn’t make me want Batty and Kelly to move here more quickly, now the events I have heard from tonight really do. I feel bad for everyone that wasn’t involved. This effects you beyond your consent and control. For the depraved actions of one person, another person died and a whole community suffers.
I wretch and feel ill at the thought that someone could do that to another person. I love you guys and miss you. I can’t think of one thing, one disagreement or one jelousy or one anything, that is worth the life of another person. If you feel that life is so cheap as to take another’s so carelessly then why should anyone respect yours? Much less that it was done, not through accident but through malice.
We all feel rage and intense dark emotions from time to time, but if we all walked about acting upon them there would be no one standing.
I can’t feel bad for the lost life because he is gone and feels no pain now, I can’t cry for the guilty because they did what they knew was wrong. I hurt for all of those who had nothing to do with it but still will suffer the repercusions of such a disgusting act of violence.
The thought of penetrating another in such hate and anger and fatally harming anyone under any circumstances just makes me ill. Especially when I didn’t know the parties but had been around them and knew of them as well as they knew of me. The true victims are the survivors. The family, the friends, the witnesses, and all those vicariously effected.
I feel for all of you going through this dark bleek happening, and in a sad way I am greatful I am not there. I too will most likely feel the rift it is making in the community upon my next trip to Houston. I feel it someways tonight, even though I am so far away.
I am to perform along side the performance/body modification company that the lost one was part of on my trip to Houston next month. I have a picture of him from last year. He was so beautiful and quiet. I just can’t imagine.
I really really reach out to all of you in any way I can.